Adventures with skunks.

[justira]

I never post AIM convos. However:

WhenKoalasKill: hold on, i gotta go tangle with a skunk
WhenKoalasKill returned at 8:32:55 PM.
WhenKoalasKill went idle at 8:43:11 PM.
WhenKoalasKill: there's a fucking skunk that won't let me into the laundry room
WhenKoalasKill returned at 8:45:19 PM.
zanydoodles: ....
zanydoodles: That is fucking hilarious.
WhenKoalasKill: it's not scared of me either
WhenKoalasKill: it doesn't respond to things being thrown at it
zanydoodles: ... is it alive?
WhenKoalasKill: yes! and it runs towards me sometimes!
zanydoodles: ...
zanydoodles: call the apartment manager?
WhenKoalasKill: i don't know the number. i just moved in.
zanydoodles: I'm sure he's instructed in dealing with skunks.
zanydoodles: It should be posted on the office.
WhenKoalasKill: office?
WhenKoalasKill: no, no, i don't think you understand. =P
WhenKoalasKill: this is very small, there is no office
WhenKoalasKill: it's posted in the laundry room, ironically
zanydoodles: ... where in the laundry room is the skunk?
WhenKoalasKill: just outside of it
zanydoodles: XD
zanydoodles: What have you thrown at it?
WhenKoalasKill: rocks, some big sticks
zanydoodles: Did you hit it?
WhenKoalasKill: yeah
zanydoodles: >.>
WhenKoalasKill: it sort of jumped and then went back to what it was doing
zanydoodles: Maybe you shouldn't abuse animals >.>
zanydoodles: I was gonna suggest pelting it with old socks.
WhenKoalasKill: maybe it shouldn't try to spray me when i come close!
zanydoodles: And what *is* it doing?
WhenKoalasKill: i think that would do nothing =P
WhenKoalasKill: eating what's left of the bees' nest, as far as i can tell
zanydoodles: ....
zanydoodles: Get a long stick and move the nest.
WhenKoalasKill: it's gone already
WhenKoalasKill: it's just crumbs
zanydoodles: Okay. Is there a hose?
WhenKoalasKill: no.
zanydoodles: Nowhere on property?
zanydoodles: Okay. Do you have a bucket or large pot?
WhenKoalasKill: uh
WhenKoalasKill: the gun nuts who knocked down the bees' nest just noticed it
WhenKoalasKill: and now they're trying to kill it with a big stick from their porch
zanydoodles: ...
zanydoodles: tell them to stop that.
zanydoodles: Get a big pot. Fill it with water. Chuck the water at the skunk.
zanydoodles: Not the pot, though.
WhenKoalasKill: hah
WhenKoalasKill: too late
WhenKoalasKill: they hit it with the big stick and it ran away
WhenKoalasKill: poor thing
zanydoodles: Oh.
zanydoodles: Well.
WhenKoalasKill: at least they didn't shoot it
zanydoodles: I hope it's okay.
WhenKoalasKill: yeah, that was a big stick
zanydoodles: Yeah. What are you doing living next to retarded gun nuts?
zanydoodles: Next time, chuck water at it.
WhenKoalasKill: i don't know where they came from!
zanydoodles: Water won't hurt it, and it's expendable.
WhenKoalasKill: i just noticed them for the first time today when they knocked down the nest
zanydoodles: Well I hope they go to hell =D
zanydoodles: ... do you mind if I post this conversation? >.>
WhenKoalasKill: no, i don't mind =P
zanydoodles: Excellent.

Thus end the Skunk Chronicles.


I was also talking to tairako at the time, who had the following advice: Okay, rules of thumb: skunk turns its back on you, that's bad. Skunk turns its back on you and raises its tail, that's doubly bad. Skunk turns its back on you and raises its tail with the tip down, then GET THE FUCK OUT XD

Yes. I hope this helps you when you have your very own Skunk Adventure.

Edit: Lo! For the hero of our tale has posted his owen telling of the tale! Mostly, I'm amused that he passed on my advice.

Edit the Second: Wah-OH! THE SKUNK RETURNS!

WhenKoalasKill: fuck, it's back
zanydoodles: XDDDDD
zanydoodles: You have no idea how hilarious this is from my end.
WhenKoalasKill: i know. it's funny here, too
WhenKoalasKill: but dammit, i need my underwear!!!
zanydoodles: Well, how about doing that bit the the pot of water now?
WhenKoalasKill: ...i'll try
zanydoodles: ... er... *with* the pot of water.
zanydoodles: Couldn't hurt.
WhenKoalasKill: see, wait
WhenKoalasKill: but if i get it to run away, it'll just come back while i'm inside and then i'll be trapped
WhenKoalasKill: and i can't throw the water at it through a closed door
WhenKoalasKill: and if i open the door, i get sprayed
zanydoodles: Then get your underweat quickly, no?
zanydoodles: Prop the door open to see.
WhenKoalasKill: hmmm
WhenKoalasKill: it's a plan.
WhenKoalasKill: brb.


To be updated as the story develops.

....


Heeeeeeeee XD

Comments

[damienden.livejournal.com]

:D This is terrific, Ira. Thank you for posting it.

[aciel.livejournal.com]

Thank the damn skunk and the gun nuts, not Ira. =P

[damienden.livejournal.com]

:D Its true, that does seem more appropriate, but I somehow lack the desire to meet either the "cute skunk" or the "gun nuts with a blowtorch". How about if I thank you, since you were directly involved, to say the least.